Perfect.
Everything about his personality is what I would wish for in any friend,
& any potential bed-mate. He’s intelligent & talks in a tone
edged with wisdom. He is clearly a thinker. Though what is it that
doesn’t sit quite right when he tells me with enthusiasm: “Oh,
absolutely! You’re so right there – nobody else can make you happy, it’s
down to the individual!”?
I
struggle to tell whether his zeal comes from finding someone who shares
his opinion on self-fulfilment, or whether he is aiming to flatter me.
“You
seem as though you have it all figured out.” he says, with just a hint
of awe that softly jabs the pit of my stomach. I feel embarrassed. I do
have it figured out, don’t I?
On
paper, he is perfect. He ticks all the boxes. So why, oh why, can’t I
appreciate how pleasant our evening has been; how refreshing it is to
speak with someone who is on the same wavelength? He clearly is, yet I
constantly have this underlying feeling that something is missing. He
puts me at ease, yet I think that ease is exactly the problem. He does
not challenge me. I feel no stir of apprehension. There is no niggle of
doubt that this person may prove me wrong. He would simply concur &
discuss the point further, as though it were fact.
I’d
like to explore. I’d love for someone to have a point of view that was
new & exciting. Sure, you have to share opinions & views on some
things – there must be common ground – but wouldn’t it be wonderful for
someone to come along & say “Well Chlo, what about this…” &
completely blow my mind, or even divulge something that would get me a
little riled – just a little though.
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